Outlander: Useful Occupations and Deceptions

kdlafsfsfsPreviously on Outlander: Claire and Jamie decided to try and derail the Jacobite rebellion, which means subtly trying to cut off its funding via the finance minister. Claire managed to upset a nobleman and found out that Jack Randall isn’t dead.

Claire wakes very early in the morning and meets Jamie just as he’s returning from another evening of enforced partying with Charles Stuart at a whorehouse. Jamie tells her Charles is demanding a meeting with Duverney, which they’ve been putting off for as long as possible. Jamie’s got to rush off to take care of some business, then meet Duverney at Versailles for chess, then meet Charles again. Poor guy must be exhausted. When does he get to sleep? Claire worries a little bit about his lack of rest but he promises to get some shut-eye on the way to the palace. He urges her to go back to bed before she has to meet Louise and other ladies for tea. Claire rolls her eyes at the tedium of these girly get-togethers but Jamie brightsides that she might pick up something useful—you never know! Also, the French aristocracy were some of the most cultured and accomplished people in the world at that time, so although they’re made to seem really boring on this show, hanging out with some of them would probably be fascinating. Hell, they’d be fascinating purely from an anthropological point of view.

On his way out the door, Jamie notices that the little carved snake he’s had since he was a kid is missing. Claire impatiently promises to look for it. You can tell that these domestic matters drive her a little crazy. She watches him go, frowning.

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Outlander: Not in Scotland Anymore

Outlander-Season-2-Episode-2-TV-Review-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-1Previously on Outlander: Claire and Jamie landed in France and, almost immediately, scored a pretty sweet deal when Jamie’s kinsman offered them a house and a wine business in Paris. He also offered an entree into Jacobite society-in-exile which should serve them well in their harebrained scheme to prevent the entire Jacobite rebellion.

It seems that Claire and Jamie are getting back into the swing of things, sexually speaking, but then suddenly Claire transforms into Randall, a knife appears in Jamie’s hand, and he stabs over and over and over again, spattering himself with blood. And yet Randall still won’t die because he’s the devil.

Jamie wakes from his nightmare, accidentally rousing Claire, who informs us that this is not the first time this has happened. Jamie tells her that Randall showed up again in this dream and she firmly reminds him that Randall is dead. Jamie knows, but he also knows he won’t be getting any more sleep that night. He gets up to go do some work.

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Outlander: Through a Glass, Darkly

Catriona Balfe as Claire Fraser in season 2 episode 1 of OutlanderPreviously on Outlander: Claire Randall touched some very old stones in the Middle of Nowhere, Scotland and was hurled back to the 18th century where, for somewhat insane and complicated reasons, she had to marry the hunkiest man available. Poor girl. There were some adventures and shenanigans and sex, and then things got truly horrifying when the ultimate Big Bad, Captain Jack Randall (an ancestor of Claire’s 20th century husband!) took a shine to Jamie and raped and tortured him while he was in prison. Claire was able to spring Jamie from the horrorshow and slapped him out of being suicidal, and then the two of them and their unborn child hopped on a ship for France to maybe try to prevent the Jacobite Rebellion.

Claire wakes in the middle of the standing stones, seeming confused, and realises she’s lost something. She searches desperately for it, finds an old ring, then begins to wail. She VOs that ‘he’ was gone—and so was everyone else. The world she’d just left was now dust. So, looks like she’s back in the 20th century.

She makes her way to the road and a car comes upon her. She seems startled and uncertain at the sound of the horn. The driver steps out and asks if she’s ok, because she looks a bit bewildered and like she’s on her way to the Renaissance fair or something. Claire just looks at him blankly, then asks him what year it is, while advancing on the poor guy with some seriously crazy eyes. He tells her it’s 1948. She then asks who won the Battle of Cullodon, completely flipping out on the poor man, who tells her the British won, of course. She collapses into the road, weeping.

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Outlander: To Ransom a Man’s Soul

Outlander-To-Ransom-a-Man-s-Soul-1x16-promotional-picture-outlander-2014-tv-series-38523305-1800-1200Previously on Outlander: Claire very nearly managed to bust Jamie out of prison, but Randall cannot be overcome, and Jamie struck a deal with him: Randall can rape Jamie all he wants if he lets Claire go. Randall accepts, and Claire is kicked out of the prison. She rushes back to the others in despair and Murtagh comes up with a plan to save Jamie.

‘You canna save a man that dinna want saving.’

It’s time for the morning muster and all the soldiers are gathered in the prison’s courtyard. Jamie, dead-eyed, lies naked on the bed in his cell, Randall stretched out beside him. Randall gets up and goes to get dressed, giving the viewers a rare moment of actual full-frontal male nudity. As he pulls on his boots, Jamie grumbles that Randall owes him a good suicide. Randall obligingly pulls out a wicked knife, but then there’s the rattling sound of another door being opened and he goes to investigate. Jamie whimpers and begs, slowly and painfully starting to roll from the bed. Randall ignores him and goes out into the hallway, heading towards the strange rumbling sound. It gets louder, and then the door he’s standing beside is busted down by 19 cattle being stampeded into the place by Angus, Rupert, and Murtagh. They glance at Randall, lying bloody and either unconscious or dead on the floor, as they hurry past. Someone should really make sure that bastard’s dead, guys.

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Outlander: Wentworth Prison

Catriona Balfe, Sam Heughlin and Tobias Menzies in Outlander

Previously on Outlander: Jamie got himself captured, escaped, and then got captured again and thrown into Wentworth Prison.

‘Make me a better offer.’

Prisoners are being hanged before a small audience of bored-looking redcoats. Taran and Jamie are amongst the condemned, waiting for their turn. Jamie tries to convince Taran to try one last stand, but Taran’s not interested, since it’ll just get them killed as surely as the rope will. So, you may as well go down fighting, right, Taran? At least, that’s what Jamie seems to think, and I’m on his side here. You’ve got absolutely nothing to lose. Taran’s called forth, and when he’s on the scaffold he shouts that it sucks that the last thing he sees will be a bunch of Englishmen and he didn’t spend his life fighting them like a true patriot. He’s thrown off the scaffold, but his neck doesn’t break. He jerks and dances, slowly strangling to death. Historically accurate and horrifying to watch. Not the last time I’m going to think that during this episode.

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Outlander: The Search

Outlander 2014Previously on Outlander: Jamie was forced to accompany the watch on what was supposed to be an ambush, only to find that the watch had been set up and now most of them are dead while he’s been taken prisoner.

‘Love forces a person to choose. You do things you never imagined you’d do before.’

Jenny and Claire start making preparations to head out and find Jamie. Ian insists on going along, but he’s too badly wounded. Also, he’s missing his peg leg. Both Jenny and Claire veto his accompanying them. They do allow him to draw them a rough map of where the men were attacked, though.

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Outlander: The Watch

Outlander 2014Previously on Outlander: Jamie took Claire back to Lallybroch, where he immediately started acting like a complete asshole to his ball-busting sister, Jenny.

‘If you’re going to hell, I might as well go too. Lord knows you’ll never manage alone.’

‘I’m a fighter. I got tired of fighting for rich dukes and monarchs. I realised the world is mine. And money taken is twice as sweet as money earned.’

The camera pans around what looks like a pocketwatch abandoned on the ground somewhere before we rejoin Jaime bravely mouthing off to the man who has a gun to his head. Jenny comes strolling in and immediately orders the man, Taran, to put his gun down, because Jamie is her cousin, not just some random guy who wandered into her home. Jamie picks up the lie and introduces himself as Jamie MacTavish. Taran pulls back his gun and Claire is able to breathe again. The men are surprised to realise Claire’s English and Jenny jokes that she was almost ready to kill Jamie himself when she realised Claire was a Sassenach, but Claire’s ok, so they’re letting it slide. Taran bows to her and introduces himself, saying he’s sorry for the confusion, but they assumed Jamie was there to rob the place. Yes, that’s a completely reasonable conclusion to jump to when you meet someone you don’t know in a house that isn’t yours.

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Outlander: Lallybroch

Outlander-LallybrochPreviously on Outlander: Jamie was banished to Colum’s castle, just in time for Claire to be put on trial for witchcraft, alongside Geillis. Though Ned put up a spirited defence, the ladies were about to be found guilty, but then Jamie appeared to rescue her, and Geillis fell on the proverbial sword, just after telling Claire that she, too, was from the future. 1968, to be exact. Afterwards, Claire told Jamie about her own time-travelling ways and he delivered her to the standing stones so she could go home if she chose. She chose to stay.

As they ride along, Claire tells Jamie all about elephants and flying and her age (27, older than him). They top a hill and Jamie’s home, Lallybroch, comes into view in the distance. They stop to admire it and Jamie takes a moment to flash back to the assault on him and his sister by Randall. Claire senses it and tries to convince him to put it all behind him. Jamie says that there were rumours afterwards that his sister bore Randall’s child, which makes it a little hard to put everything in the past.

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Outlander: The Devil’s Mark

Oulander-Season-1-Episode-11Previously on Outlander: Claire found out that Geillis was having an affair with Dougal, resulting in a secret pregnancy and prompting Geillis to pray to Mother Earth for the death of Dougal’s wife (granted), followed by the poisoning of her husband. Jamie stood as Sandringham’s second in a duel that resulted in a brawl with another clan, so to punish him Colum ordered him to accompany Dougal home for the funeral of his wife. Left back at Castle Leoch, Claire did the one thing Jamie asked her not to do and went to go see Geillis, allowing them to be arrested for witchcraft together.

‘Looks like I’m going to a f*cking barbeque.’

The two women are literally thrown into an underground cell together to await trial. There’s some blame throwing between the two women, and Claire tells Geillis that Laoghaire ratted her out, and furthermore, maybe this wouldn’t have happened if Geillis had attempted to keep a slightly lower profile. Like Claire’s one to talk. Claire accuses Geillis of murdering her husband and Geillis cops to it, saying she started white arsenic a few months ago, hoping to kill Arthur off before she started to show, leaving her free to marry Dougal. Geillis does that creepy giggle and tries to get Claire to feel the baby’s kicking, but Claire’s not interested. When someone comes by with a crust of bread for them, Claire tries to tell him that she’s the wife of the laird’s nephew, but the man doesn’t listen. Geillis reassures Claire they won’t be there long, because Dougal will come for them. Claire informs her that Dougal’s been banished, so he’s not coming to anyone’s rescue anytime soon. Geillis’s face says, ‘oh, shit.’

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Outlander: By the Pricking Of My Thumbs

outlander-by-the-pricking-of-my-thumbs-s01e10-1080p-mkv_003376790Previously on Outlander: Jamie rescued Claire from Randall, putting himself right in the man’s sights yet again and getting him in a huge amount of trouble with Colum, who’s already pissed off about the Jacobite fundraising that’s been going on. Laoghaire tried to seduce Jamie, and when that failed, she put some kind of curse talisman under Jamie’s and Claire’s bed.

Murtagh rudely interrupts Claire’s and Jamie’s morning cunnilingus to tell Jamie that Sandringham has come north at Colum’s invitation. Turns out, the Duke, a not-so-secret homosexual, has always been ‘fond’ of Jamie, and Jamie thinks Sandringham might be able to get the price on his head lifted. Murtagh agrees it’s worth asking, but warns Jamie that the man doesn’t just grant favours without some sort of payback. Claire warns them both not to trust Sandringham, since he’s a close ally of Randall. That’s news to both of them, though Murtagh seems a bit sceptical. He nonetheless suggests Jamie have a word with Ned before he approaches the Duke. Jamie agrees, then excitedly tells Claire that this could be the first step back to Lallybroch, where he’ll be laird and she’ll be his lady and they’ll certainly be happy. He’s so puppydog excited she just smiles and nods.

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