Game of Thrones: The Winds of Winter

476290-game-of-thrones-season-6-episode-10-dragonsPreviously on Game of Thrones: The date of Cersei’s and Loras’s trials were set, Dany got herself a fleet, and Jon retook Winterfell.

Last episode of the season, folks! In previous years this has tended to be a quiet episode, but this year the powers that be decided to go a little off script and do something exciting. And thank God for that, because most of the rest of the season was a bit draggy, don’t you think?

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Game of Thrones: Battle of the Bastards

gameofthrones1-large_trans++piVx42joSuAkZ0bE9ijUnGH28ZiNHzwg9svuZLxrn1UPreviously on Game of Thrones: Meereen came under attack and Jon rallied his (very small) forces and started heading for Winterfell.

Things aren’t looking so good in Meereen. The city’s being blasted by fireballs catapulted from all those ships in the bay. Dany’s plan is to go fully nuclear, grab her dragons and burn the other cities in Slavers’ Bay to the ground. Tyrion reminds her that that same strategy is basically what got her father stabbed in the back and suggests they try at least a little diplomacy.

Some of the masters, along with one random guy who I guess is connected with their military, are summoned to the Great Pyramid for peace negotiations. They think Dany’s about to surrender, but that’s because they’re idiots who have, apparently, forgotten she has dragons and isn’t afraid to use them. And she also has a massive Dothraki army that is, even now, descending on some Sons of the Harpy who are down on the beach slaughtering people who are on the beach in the middle of a battle for no reason whatsoever. While the Harpies are being taken care of, Dany hops on board Drogon and burns a few of the masters’ ships. They quickly capitulate and get their throats slashed by Grey Worm. The one non-master is left alive to spread the story of how this all went down. Also, Tyrion politely thanks them for the new armada.

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Game of Thrones: No One

Tyrion sees Varys off on a mission in episode 8 of season 6 of Game of thronesPreviously on Game of Thrones: Arya got gut stabbed by the Waif, Jamie besieged Riverrun, and the Hound is alive and out for some revenge.

Lady Crane is onstage, giving a standout performance that brings the audience to tears. The applause and cheers are plentiful, and she bows and retreats backstage, where she hears a noise. Understandably wary, she goes to investigate and finds Arya on her bed, holding her wounded belly.

Lady Crane tends to her, bandaging her wounds (a skill she picked up after having inflicted a few herself, on unreliable lovers). We learn that the actress who went after Lady Crane is no longer with the company, and Lady C messed her face up pretty good, so she’s probably not going to be acting again anywhere soon. Lady C offers Arya a job with the company, now they’re down an actress, but Arya declines, choosing instead to explore the world.

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